First - A Little Background...

What follows was initially penned as a letter to a very close friend who was struggling with alcohol; I offered my unwavering support and availability, emphasizing that the solution must stem from within. How might I know that? Because at the age of 44, I transformed my life from the depths of hell through a challenging road to recovery. I emerged on the other side, free from the grasp of alcohol, to a rather extraordinary life.

Over time, I’ve witnessed the devastating impact of alcohol on several friends. Some continued their lives seemingly unaffected, while others sought rehabilitation, and tragically, one succumbed to her addiction.

The profound suffering of this very close friend, particularly during her final years of long-term alcohol abuse, and the enduring pain it inflicted on her children, was heart-wrenching. She and my wife became the closest of friends in kindergarten and remained so until her untimely passing.

After college, both she and my wife married, had three children, and settled into homes close to one another. Our families became good friends over the next decade; it was common for us to drop by each other’s homes unannounced. We often enjoyed laid-back dinners together every Saturday evening after an afternoon of lounging by the pool during the hot summer months.

Yet, as developing alcoholics, my wife’s best friend and I became adept at concealing our struggles. In the earlier years, if they suspected I had a problem, they never mentioned it, and if my wife thought her best friend was struggling, she never let on. Although her friend eventually stopped drinking years after I did, the irreversible damage—both personal and physical—was done. Due to issues brought on by years of alcohol abuse, she passed away just as the COVID lockdowns began, marking the last in-person memorial we would attend for a long time.

COVID seemed to exacerbate the struggles of those dealing with addiction. That fall, I was shocked to learn about a friend-of-a-friend who fell into an alcoholic coma and never awoke. Another friend, whom I had no idea was battling alcohol, spent the Christmas holidays in court-ordered rehab.

These events caused me to reflect on how fortunate I’ve been. Happily remarried with a thriving family living in a beautiful home; all of our bills paid with enough money left over each month that I was able to contribute a significant amount toward retirement. And, perhaps best of all, after having spent years waking up every morning and immediately wondering “do I have enough liquor left in the bottle to get me through the day—or do I need to get to the liquor store sometime today?” that thought never, ever entered my mind again.

This prompted me to revisit a letter that I had written to a very close friend a few years earlier who had been facing a similar challenge to the one I once faced. I instinctively knew she was headed down the same path of destruction I had walked, and I feared she might follow the path my wife’s friend had taken. Knowing from my own experience with alcohol that directly approaching her would most likely cause her to withdraw and become angry with me, I didn’t want a fence to come between us; so instead, I sat down and wrote her a heartfelt letter. As promised, I never shared the contents with anyone else.

This website emerged from that letter.

I have modified the original letter, changing some details to protect the identities of those involved and adding my own experiences. My goal is for this story to be both engaging and hopeful.

My aim with this site is purely to share hope and encouragement, without any commercial interest.

If you or someone you know is on a similar path, I hope my words provide comfort and reassurance. No matter how bleak the future may seem, there is a way forward, free from the despair of addiction. I have walked this path from destruction to recovery and fulfillment. We are continually evolving, and every day offers a new beginning. Above all, never lose hope.